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SONG TITLES AND LYRICS

All music & lyrics © 1998 Renegade Arts
except * Sam Samudio, BMI & ** Nathaniel Harp, BMI

                                                                                             1. PARTY IN MY PANTS
                                                                                             2. MENTAL FLOSS
                                                                                             3. ROT-GUT WHISKEY
                                                                                             4. LISTEN
                                                                                             5. WOOLY BULLY*
                                                                                             6. ONE FOR THE ROAD
                                                                                             7. BIRTHDAY BLUES
                                                                                             8. SHANNON'S SONG
                                                                                             9. PLAY THAT FUNKY MUSIC WHITE BOY**
                                                                                             10. TOP 10 LIES
                                                                                             11. I DON'T NEED YA
                                                                                             12. ROCK WHILE YOU CAN

PARTY IN MY PANTS

R. Horn (BMI)

I got up this morning with a feeling in my head, It’d be groovy if you’d be layin’ with me in my bed.

All day long I’m swellin’ from the River of Desire, Better hose me down there, Darlin’, ‘cause you’re stokin’ up my fire.

I can’t stand the pressure ‘cause somethin’s gonna blow. Girl, just listen to me ‘cause there’s something you should know.

There’s a party in my pants. There’s a party in my pants. There’s a party in my pants. And baby don’t ya wanna come?

Well, turn me down and hurt me, Darlin’, I don’t really care, I’ve become a time-bomb in explodin’ underwear.

The air is gettin’ hotter from the perfume that you use, If you get any closer, Baby, you’ll ignite my fuse.

The Earth will be a tremblin’ for 20 mile or so, So, hunker in my bunker and get ready for the blow.

If you need some protection, Honey, I have got the gun, Get a load of my hot pistol, Darlin’, it’s not just for fun.

I don’t take shootin’ lightly and I won’t invite the town, But, you’ve a standin’ invitation, Girl, if you want to get down.

There’s party hats and favors and the tunes are kinda hip, So walk your stockings over, Honey, I’ll provide the dip.

 

Mental Floss

R. Horn (BMI)

Oh baby, Tell me just what gets you off

Baby, When your ship is gettin’ tossed

When you want to clear your mind, What do you use for mental floss?

Oh baby, I know what gets you off

I said Baby, I’ll run barefoot through your moss

When you want to clear your mind, I will be your mental floss!

 

Rot-Gut Whiskey

R. Horn (BMI)

Loaded to the gills on Rot-Gut Whiskey, Better know I made my own way.

I’ve paid my debts and I got no regrets, Come listen to me children, hear what I’ve got to say.

Been loaded to the gills on Rot-Gut Whiskey, ‘Bout to lose my mind,

Loaded to the gills on Rot-Gut Whiskey, And I’ve been wastin’ time.

Well, I broke down in Buddy’s hometown, Flat broke and busted at the Cotton Club.

I hit some bars and started seein’ stars, I ate some pavement outside every pub.

So, if you’re down and out in Podunk, And you’re checkin’ out the night-time scene.

Well, be aware, it gets dangerous out there, When you’re shootin’ whiskey them ol’ streets can turn mean.

 

LISTEN

R. Horn (BMI)

Listen, Hear the wind blow. Listen, Fear what you know.

The passing of time, Has made us all blind. We’ve witnessed the Crime, Of Souls.

Listen, Hear the dead cry. Listen, They ask us why,

We buried their name To cover our shame. But we’re all the same, We die.

 

One For The Road

S. Ryan (BMI)

It’s getting late but we’re just getting started, The band is done and the lights are comin’ on

Guess I lost another beer on the dance floor, The waitress says, "You should be long gone"

But I ain’t done with this night, I’m gettin’ ready to kick ass, I ain’t done with this night yet.

Bassman’s gettin’ louder by the minute, Guitar’s hands are full of honey pie

I’m beggin’ ya please, just one more little round dear, If I can’t have one last drink I’m gonna die!

‘Cause I ain’t done with this night, I’m gettin’ ready to kick ass, I ain’t done with this night yet

One for the road (You hear me talkin’ I need)

One for the road (Then I’ll be outta here)

One for the road (Just give one more waitress)

One for the road

‘Cause I ain’t done with this night, I’m gettin’ ready to kick ass, I ain’t done with this night yet.

The crowd is gone, they’re moppin’ down the dance floor, It looks like we’ll be closin’ down the hall

I’m beggin’ ya please just one more little round dear, One last taste of demon alcohol

‘Cause I ain’t done with this night, I’m gettin’ ready to kick ass, I ain’t done with this night yet.

 

Birthday Blues

R. Horn (BMI)

Well, I hear it’s your birthday, Now, how old are you?

That’s what ya told us last year isn’t it? Now, who’s foolin’ who?

You ain’t gettin’ any younger, No way, no how!

The time for celebrating Is right here and now.

Yeah, it’s your birthday And you got them Birthday Blues.

I said, it’s your birthday And you got them Birthday Blues.

Well, I’m glad it ain’t my birthday, ‘Cause then I’d be old just like you!

There’s so many candles On your birthday cake,

It looks like a bonfire, Baby. For goodness sake!

Your best friend got you a stripper. Mom baked you a pie. (A cherry pie!)

Your daddy told you the facts of life, "First you get old, then you die!"

Well, it's your birthday And I hope you're havin' fun.

I said, it's your birthday And I hope you're havin' fun.

Let's party on your birthday, 'Cause this might just be your last one!

 

Shannon’s Song

S. Ryan (BMI)

Baby girl, The stars are in your eyes. Baby girl, The stars are in your eyes.

Your daddy loves to see ya smile. So, look at me for a little while. I thank the Lord each day you are my child.

Baby girl, The stars are in your eyes.

Baby girl, I hate to see you weep. Baby girl, I love to see you sleep.

I wonder who you’re dreaming of, Who you’re with and who you’ll love. And yet I know you were sent from up above.

Baby girl, The stars are in your eyes.

Now I know it won’t be long. You’ll grow up fast and be on your own. So, take your time. Give me a chance to sing this song.

 

TOP 10 LIES

R. Horn (BMI)

The check’s in the mail and I promise to pay, "I’ll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today"

These are a few of the things we hold true, Deceit never dies, so here are the Top 10 Lies

My auntie is sick and I can’t make our date, I had a flat tire, or I had to work late (yeah, that’s it)

The webs that we weave are now crushing our faith, We’ve lost sight of truth, but we still have our Top 10 Lies

Our leaders are good and the system won’t fail, "No new taxes" and "I didn’t inhale"

We sing that same song and the press heaps it on, We’ve all become flies, so here are the Top 10 Lies

 

I DON’T NEED YA

R. Horn (BMI)

I don’t need ya treatin’ me like ya do; I don’t ya thinkin’ me a fool

You’ve been strayin’ and I’ve been sayin’ you’re wrong; I’ve been needin’ but you ain’t been heedin’ baby

I’ve been patient but you kept me waitin’ too long

I dont’ need ya wastin’ all my time; I don’t need ya treating me like slime

Endless midnights when you told me you would be home; I was wantin’ while you were out huntin’ baby

I tried to warn you but now you’ll be left all alone

I don’t need ya spendin’ all my cash; I don’t need ya to throw me out like trash

Ya took it all until there was nothing left to give; Ya never earned it but you sure could burn it baby

Now it’s hopeless and this is just no way to live

I don’t need ya I’m goin’ my own way; I don’t need ya there’s nothing left to say

Broken promises fall from your lips to my ears; But I can’t hear you I’m deafened by pain baby

So go and find someone whose eyes haven’t run dry of tears

I don’t need ya; I don’t need ya; I don’t need ya; I don’t need ya

 

ROCK WHILE YOU CAN

R. Horn, S. Ryan & Casper (BMI)

Brushin’ off the cobwebs from my trusty ol’ axe, Sometimes I think it’s my only friend

Wish that you could understand the way that I feel, I pack it up and hit the road again

All your friends are doggin’ me and sayin’ I’m no good, It’s drivin’ me insane

You won’t hear my side you just put your friends first, You wouldn’t come and see us if we were the last band on earth

You better rock while you can, You better rock while you can

You better rock while you can, You better rock while you can

No one took us serious they thought we were a joke, Just some kind of funky toy band

But now we’re gettin’ email from all over the world, At least we got some cool cyber-fans

You’d just rather sit around and think that you’re so good, Yeah you and all your ugly friends

You’d rather sit around and shovel up your dirt, You wouldn’t see us if we were the last band on earth

I can’t wait forever for you to come around, There’s just too much rockin’ to do

We’re just out to party and to have a good time, And if you want your friends can come too

Judgin’ by the dancers on the bar every night, We must be doin’ something right

This is the time and place you want to quench your thirst, So raise your glass and drink a toast to The Last Band On Earth